Pre-Birthday Blues

Tia at age 3

 Hello all.

The time is now 9:35am Thursday, February 11th. The day before my 22nd birthday.

You probably think I’m jumping for joy with excitement and anticipation like the typical nine-year old anxiously awaiting  hitting double digits. That is sadly not the case.

I have the birthday blues this year!  

To many of my earlier birthdays have accumulated much debate and fuss so this year I refuse to get boggled down with details and parades. It’s just one day!

Normally around this time of the year I am mad dashing to the shoppes and malls finding the perfect outfit, with fancy matching shoes, curtailing to the hair salon, nails, the whole shebang!

I would consciously remind all my friends at least twenty times a night that my special day was fastly approaching, but that’s again not the case either.

Every year my vision would entail a major celebration where I could bask in all my glory of good friends, food, and love.

Unfortunately, that’s not at all what I’m going for tomorrow.

Tomorrow on February 12th, 2010 I only want love.

Seems simple enough? It is.

I find myself not wanting or desiring the big ambiguous luxury parade that I sought the previous 21 years of my life.

No extravagant party, no elaborate dress, no fancy shoes, no fuss…

Just me, my main three (Erica, Van, Whittney) and maybe some drinks!

I mean after all I am legally allowed! I want love on this very special day. To me I truly couldn’t ask for anything else.

I have a tremendous group of supporters, family, and friends that have for these past years who have gave me unconditional love! Love that is never seen in the movies or replicated, nor faked.

Love that may hurt your feelings.

Love that tells you the truth.

Love that isn’t afraid to do the right thing. Even when it hurts.

Love I couldn’t receive from any other group of people.

My birthday blues isn’t the blues Billie Holiday often spoke of hurtful and tragics but the type of blues that makes you feel soulful and patient.

Blues that makes you want to get up and dance! Get up and feel the words not just the melody.

Blues sound so good make you wanna slap yo… Well can’t say that. Mom’s probably reading. Hey Mom!

But blues that comes out of one’s heart. That pours on the paper, through the radio, and loudly in your ear!

My birthday blues comes at such a crucial time in my life because I am breaking down barriers and accomplishing my goals.

I couldn’t ask for anything else. The feeling of excelling far beyond what you imagined is the best feeling in the world!!

I love my busy, exhausting, fast pace life! Working for Fox59 the station I grew up watching and being apart of Radio One which is another wonderful assets in my collection.

The experience I’ve gained through those organizations has truly left me fulfilled in so many ways… I don’t need no parade!

I don’t need no parade because the love that I so wish on February 12th is already there… So no fuss everyone. Just love and more of it!!

Take care. Have a wonderful day.

4 Comments

  1. Tenia S.

    Great article Tia..its shows that you’re maturing! Happy Belated birthday and keep doing you!

  2. Katie

    I have felt like this for the past few birthdays of mine and other holidays too. I think it’s a sign of growing up, or maturing (not that we aren’t already beautiful mature women). Of course the “shebangs” are okay, but the people that we love and vice versa are the real shebangs of our lives. Have a wonderful birthday and enjoy this next year!

    -Katie B.

    P.S. Your daughter looks just like you, especially in the picture you posted for this blog. Awwwh.

  3. Delaiah

    I really enjoyed this entry. I really understand where you are coming from I kinda felt like that this past birthday!! I have decided to enjoy myself until love comes…It will, and if it doesn’t I can still say that I enjoyed life to the fullest!!!

  4. Mia Richardson

    Tia,

    This is so true, I believe everyone has this moment in their life where they realize they don’t need all the materialistic things and with love and support one can go a long way. Also I am very proud of you, all the years I have known you, you have always reached your goals and you are truly a go getter!! love ya

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